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my name is red-我的名字叫红-第章

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Elegant Effendi to this dervish lodge in the middle of the night! I brought him 
here  with  the  excuse  that  we’d  nearly  frozen  walking  the  streets  so  long。  In 
actuality; it pleased me to show him I was a free…thinking Kalenderi throwback; 
or worse yet; that I aspired to be a Kalenderi。 When Elegant understood I was 
the  last  of  the  followers  of  a  dervish  order  based  on  pederasty;  hashish 
consumption;  vagrancy  and  all  manner  of  aberrant  behavior;  I  thought  he’d 
fear  and  respect  me  even  more;  and  in  turn;  be  intimidated  into  silence。  As 
fate  would  have  it;  the  exact  opposite  happened。  Our  dim…witted  boyhood 
friend  disliked  it  here;  and  he  quickly  decided  the  accusations  of  blasphemy 
he’d  learned  from  your  Enishte  ark。  So;  our  beloved 
apprenticeship  panion;  who’d  at  first  implored;  ”Help  me;  convince  me 
that we won’t go to Hell so I might sleep in peace tonight;“ in a newfound; 
threatening tone; began to insist that ”this will end in nothing but evil。“ He 
was convinced the preacher hoja from Erzurum would hear the rumors that in 
the  final  picture  we’d  veered  from  the  orders  of  Our  Sultan;  who’d  never 
forgive  this  transgression。  Convincing  him  everything  was  clear  skies  and 
sunshine   was   nearly   impossible。   He’d   tell   all   to   the   preacher’s   dull 
congregation;  exaggerating  Enishte’s  absurdities;  the  anxieties  about  affronts 
to  the  religion  and  rendering  the  Devil  in  a  favorable  light;  and  they’d 
naturally believe every slanderous word。 I don’t have to tell you how; not only 
the artisans; but the entire society of craftsmen have grown jealous of us since 
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we’ve  bee  the  intense  focus  of  Our  Sultan’s  attention。  Now  all  of  them 
will  gleefully  declare  in  unison  ”the  miniaturists  are  mired  in  heresy。“ 
Furthermore;  the  cooperation  between  Enishte  and  Elegant  Effendi  would 
prove  this  slander  true。  I  say  ”slander‘  because  I  don’t  believe  in  what  my 
brother Elegant said about the book and the last picture。 Even then; I would 
hear nothing against your late Enishte。 I found it quite appropriate that Our 
Sultan  turn  his  favors  from  Master  Osman  to  Enishte  Effendi;  and  I  even 
believed;  if  not  to  the  same  degree;  what  Enishte  described  to  me  at  length 
about the Frankish masters and their artistry。 I used to believe quite sincerely 
that we Ottoman artists could fortably take from this or that aspect of the 
Frankish methods as much as our hearts desired or as much as could be seen 
during a visit abroad—without bartering with the Devil or bringing any great 
harm upon us。 Life was easy; your Enishte; may he rest in peace; had succeeded 
Master Osman; and was a new father to me in this new life。“ 
“Let’s  not  discuss  that  point  yet;”  said  Black。  “First  describe  how  you 
murdered Elegant。” 
“This  deed;”  I  said;  recognizing  that  I  couldn’t  use  the  word  “murder;”  “I 
mitted this deed not only for us; to save us; but for the salvation of the 
entire workshop。 Elegant Effendi knew he posed a powerful threat。 I prayed to 
Almighty God; begging him to give me a sign showing me how despicable this 
scoundrel really was。 My prayers were answered when I offered Elegant money。 
God  had  shown  me  how  wretched  he  really  was。  These  gold  pieces  came  to 
mind; but by divine inspiration; I lied。 I said the gold pieces weren’t here in 
the lodge; but I’d hidden them elsewhere。 We went out。 I walked him through 
empty  streets  and  out…of…the…way  neighborhoods  without  any  consideration 
for where we were going。 I had no idea what I would do; and in short; I was 
afraid。 At the end of our wandering; after we’d e to a street we’d passed 
earlier;  our  brother  Elegant  Effendi  the  gilder;  who  devoted  his  entire  life  to 
form and repetition; grew suspicious。 But God provided me with an empty lot 
ravaged by fire; and nearby; a dry well。” 
At this point I knew I couldn’t go on and I told them so。 “If you were in my 
shoes; you would’ve considered the salvation of your artist brethren and done 
the same thing;” I said confidently。 
When I heard them agree with me; I felt like crying。 I was going to say it 
was because their passion; which I hardly deserved; softened my heart; but 
no。 I was going to say it was because I again heard the thud of his body hitting 
the bottom of the well wherein I dropped him after killing him; but no。 I was 
going to say it was because I remembered how happy I was before being a 
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murderer; how I’d been like everybody else; but no。 The blind man who used 
to  pass  through  our  neighborhood  in  my  childhood  appeared  in  my  mind’s 
eye: He’d take a dirty metal water dipper out of his even dirtier clothes; and 
would  call  out  to  us  neighborhood  kids  who  watched  him  from  a  distance; 
there  by  the  local  water  fountain;  “My  children;  which  of  you  will  fill  this 
blind old man’s drinking cup with water from the fountain?” When no one 
went to his aid; he’d say; “It’d be a good turn; my children; a pious deed!” The 
color of his irises had faded and they were nearly the same color as the whites 
of his eyes。 
Agitated by the thought of resembling that blind old man; I confessed how 
I  did  away  with  Enishte  Effendi  hurriedly;  without  savoring  any  of  it。  I  was 
neither   too   honest   nor   too   insincere   with   them:   I   found   a   medium 
consistency;  such  that  the  story  wouldn’t  trouble  my  heart  too  much;  and 
they’d be assured I hadn’t gone to Enishte’s house to murder him。 I wanted 
to  make  clear  that  it  wasn’t  a  premeditated  murder;  which  intent  they 
gathered  when  I  reminded  them  of  the  following  while  trying  to  absolve 
myself: “Without harboring bad intentions; one never goes to Hell。” 
“After   surrendering   Elegant   Effendi   to   the   Angels   of   Allah;”   I   said 
thoughtfully; “what the dearly departed expressed t
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