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〃Bella; Bella; stop;〃 he interrupted me; his words pouring out so quickly
they were hard to understand。 〃You're worrying about all the wrong
things; Bella。 Trust me on this — none of us are in jeopardy。 You are
under too much strain as it is; don't add to it with wholly unnecessary
worries。 Listen to me!〃 he ordered; for I had looked away。 〃Our family is
strong。 Our only fear is losing you。〃
〃But why should you —〃
Alice interrupted this time; touching my cheek with her cold fingers。
〃It's been almost a century that Edward's been alone。 Now he's found you。
You can't see the changes that we see; we who have been with him for so
long。 Do you think any of us want to look into his eyes for the next
hundred years if he loses you?〃
My guilt slowly subsided as I looked into her dark eyes。 But; even as the
calm spread over me; I knew I couldn't trust my feelings with Jasper
there。
It was a very long day。
We stayed in the room。 Alice called down to the front desk and asked them
to ignore our maid service for now。 The windows stayed shut; the TV on;
though no one watched it。 At regular intervals; food was delivered for
me。 The silver phone resting on Alice's bag seemed to grow bigger as the
hours passed。
My babysitters handled the suspense better than I did。 As I fidgeted and
paced; they simply grew more still; two statues whose eyes followed me
imperceptibly as I moved。 I occupied myself with memorizing the room; the
striped pattern of the couches; tan; peach; cream; dull gold; and tan
again。 Sometimes I stared at the abstract prints; randomly finding
pictures in the shapes; like I'd found pictures in the clouds as a child。
I traced a blue hand; a woman bing her hair; a cat stretching。 But
when the pale red circle became a staring eye; I looked away。
As the afternoon wore on; I went back to bed; simply for something to do。
I hoped that by myself in the dark; I could give in to the terrible fears
that hovered on the edge of my consciousness; unable to break through
under Jasper's careful supervision。
But Alice followed me casually; as if by some coincidence she had grown
tired of the front room at the same time。 I was beginning to wonder
exactly what sort of instructions Edward had given her。 I lay across the
bed; and she sat; legs folded; next to me。 I ignored her at first;
suddenly tired enough to sleep。 But after a few minutes; the panic that
had held off in Jasper's presence began to make itself known。 I gave up
on the idea of sleep quickly then; curling up into a small ball; wrapping
my arms around my legs。
〃Alice?〃 I asked。
〃Yes?〃
I kept my voice very calm。 〃What do you think they're doing?〃
〃Carlisle wanted to lead the tracker as far north as possible; wait for
him to get close; and then turn and ambush him。 Esme and Rosalie were
supposed to head west as long as they could keep the female behind them。
If she turned around; they were to head back to Forks and keep an eye on
your dad。 So I imagine things are going well if they can't call。 It means
the tracker is close enough that they don't want him to overhear。〃
〃And Esme?〃
〃I think she must be back in Forks。 She won't call if there's any chance
the female will overhear。 I expect they're all just being very careful。〃
〃Do you think they're safe; really?〃
〃Bella; how many times do we have to tell you that there's no danger to
us?〃
〃Would you tell me the truth; though?〃
〃Yes。 I will always tell you the truth。〃 Her voice was earnest。
I deliberated for a moment; and decided she meant it。
〃Tell me then… how do you bee a vampire?〃
My question caught her off guard。 She was quiet。 I rolled over to look at
her; and her expression seemed ambivalent。
〃Edward doesn't want me to tell you that;〃 she said firmly; but I sensed
she didn't agree。
〃That's not fair。 I think I have a right to know。〃
〃I know。〃
I looked at her; waiting。
She sighed。 〃He'll be extremely angry。〃
〃It's none of his business。 This is between you and me。 Alice; as a
friend; I'm begging you。〃 And we were friends now; somehow — as she must
have known we would be all along。
She looked at me with her splendid; wise eyes… choosing。
〃I'll tell you the mechanics of it;〃 she said finally; 〃but I don't
remember it myself; and I've never done it or seen it done; so keep in
mind that I can only tell you the theory。〃
I waited。
〃As predators; we have a glut of weapons in our physical arsenal — much;
much more than really necessary。 The strength; the speed; the acute
senses; not to mention those of us like Edward; Jasper; and I; who have
extra senses as well。 And then; like a carnivorous flower; we are
physically attractive to our prey。〃
I was very still; remembering how pointedly Edward had demonstrated the
same concept for me in the meadow。
She smiled a wide; ominous smile。 〃We have another fairly superfluous
weapon。 We're also venomous;〃 she said; her teeth glistening。 〃The venom
doesn't kill — it's merely incapacitating。 It works slowly; spreading
through the bloodstream; so that; once bitten; our prey is in too much
physical pain to escape us。 Mostly superfluous; as I said。 If we're that
close; the prey doesn't escape。 Of course; there are always exceptions。
Carlisle; for example。〃
〃So… if the venom is left to spread…〃 I murmured。
〃It takes a few days for the transformation to be plete; depending on
how much venom is in the bloodstream; how close the venom enters to the
heart。 As long as the heart keeps beating; the poison spreads; healing;
changing the body as it moves through it。 Eventually the heart stops; and
the conversion is finished。 But all that time; every minute of it; a
victim would be wishing for death。〃
I shivered。
〃It's not pleasant; you see。〃
〃Edward said that it was very hard to do… I don't quite understand;〃 I
said。
〃We're also like sharks in a way。 Once we taste the blood; or even smell
it for that matter; it bees very hard to keep from feeding。 Sometimes
impossible。 So you see; to actually bite someone; to taste the blood; i