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on my sleeptalking。〃
〃Please?〃 His voice was so persuasive; so impossible to resist。
I shook my head。
〃If you don't tell me; I'll just assume it's something much worse than it
is;〃 he threatened darkly。 〃Please?〃 Again; that pleading voice。
〃Well;〃 I began; glad that he couldn't see my face。
〃Yes?〃
〃You said that Rosalie and Emmett will get married soon… Is that…
marriage… the same as it is for humans?〃
He laughed in earnest now; understanding。 〃Is that what you're getting
at?〃
I fidgeted; unable to answer。
〃Yes; I suppose it is much the same;〃 he said。 〃I told you; most of those
human desires are there; just hidden behind more powerful desires。〃
〃Oh;〃 was all I could say。
〃Was there a purpose behind your curiosity?〃
〃Well; I did wonder… about you and me… someday…〃
He was instantly serious; I could tell by the sudden stillness of his
body。 I froze; too; reacting automatically。
〃I don't think that… that… would be possible for us。〃
〃Because it would be too hard for you; if I were that… close?〃
〃That's certainly a problem。 But that's not what I was thinking of。 It's
just that you are so soft; so fragile。 I have to mind my actions every
moment that we're together so that I don't hurt you。 I could kill you
quite easily; Bella; simply by accident。〃 His voice had bee just a
soft murmur。 He moved his icy palm to rest it against my cheek。 〃If I was
too hasty… if for one second I wasn't paying enough attention; I could
reach out; meaning to touch your face; and crush your skull by mistake。
You don't realize how incredibly breakable you are。 I can never; never
afford to lose any kind of control when I'm with you。〃
He waited for me to respond; growing anxious when I didn't。 〃Are you
scared?〃 he asked。
I waited for a minute to answer; so the words would be true。 〃No。 I'm
fine。〃
He seemed to deliberate for a moment。 〃I'm curious now; though;〃 he said;
his voice light again。 〃Have you ever… ?〃 He trailed off suggestively。
〃Of course not。〃 I flushed。 〃I told you I've never felt like this about
anyone before; not even close。〃
〃I know。 It's just that I know other people's thoughts。 I know love and
lust don't always keep the same pany。〃
〃They do for me。 Now; anyway; that they exist for me at all;〃 I sighed。
〃That's nice。 We have that one thing in mon; at least。〃 He sounded
satisfied。
〃Your human instincts…〃 I began。 He waited。 〃Well; do you find me
attractive; in that way; at all?〃
He laughed and lightly rumpled my nearly dry hair。
〃I may not be a human; but I am a man;〃 he assured me。
I yawned involuntarily。
〃I've answered your questions; now you should sleep;〃 he insisted。
〃I'm not sure if I can。〃
〃Do you want me to leave?〃
〃No!〃 I said too loudly。
He laughed; and then began to hum that same; unfamiliar lullaby; the
voice of an archangel; soft in my ear。
More tired than I realized; exhausted from the long day of mental and
emotional stress like I'd never felt before; I drifted to sleep in his
cold arms。
===========================================================================
15。 THE CULLENS
The muted light of yet another cloudy day eventually woke me。 I lay with
my arm across my eyes; groggy and dazed。 Something; a dream trying to be
remembered; struggled to break into my consciousness。 I moaned and rolled
on my side; hoping more sleep would e。 And then the previous day
flooded back into my awareness。
〃Oh!〃 I sat up so fast it made my head spin。
〃Your hair looks like a haystack… but I like it。〃 His unruffled voice
came from the rocking chair in the corner。
〃Edward! You stayed!〃 I rejoiced; and thoughtlessly threw myself across
the room and into his lap。 In the instant that my thoughts caught up with
my actions; I froze; shocked by my own uncontrolled enthusiasm。 I stared
up at him; afraid that I had crossed the wrong line。
But he laughed。
〃Of course;〃 he answered; startled; but seeming pleased by my reaction。
His hands rubbed my back。
I laid my head cautiously against his shoulder; breathing in the smell of
his skin。
〃I was sure it was a dream。〃
〃You're not that creative;〃 he scoffed。
〃Charlie!〃 I remembered; thoughtlessly jumping up again and heading to
the door。
〃He left an hour ago — after reattaching your battery cables; I might
add。 I have to admit I was disappointed。 Is that really all it would take
to stop you; if you were determined to go?〃
I deliberated where I stood; wanting to return to him badly; but afraid I
might have morning breath。
〃You're not usually this confused in the morning;〃 he noted。 He held his
arms open for me to return。 A nearly irresistible invitation。
〃I need another human minute;〃 I admitted。
〃I'll wait。〃
I skipped to the bathroom; my emotions unrecognizable。 I didn't know
myself; inside or out。 The face in the mirror was practically a stranger
— eyes too bright; hectic spots of red across my cheekbones。 After I
brushed my teeth; I worked to straighten out the tangled chaos that was
my hair。 I splashed my face with cold water; and tried to breathe
normally; with no noticeable success。 I halfran back to my room。
It seemed like a miracle that he was there; his arms still waiting for
me。 He reached out to me; and my heart thumped unsteadily。
〃Wele back;〃 he murmured; taking me into his arms。
He rocked me for a while in silence; until I noticed that his clothes
were changed; his hair smooth。
〃You left?〃 I accused; touching the collar of his fresh shirt。
〃I could hardly leave in the clothes I came in — what would the neighbors
think?〃
I pouted。
〃You were very deeply asleep; I didn't miss anything。〃 His eyes gleamed。
〃The talking came earlier。〃
I groaned。 〃What did you hear?〃
His gold eyes grew very soft。 〃You said you loved me。〃
〃You knew that already;〃 I reminded him; ducking my head。
〃It was nice to hear; just the same。〃
I hid my face against his shoulder。
〃I love you;〃 I whispered。
〃You are my life now;〃 he answered simply。
There was not